Emor: Is it אסור to have fun?

By Mordy Blau

Is it אסור to have fun? [1]

The Declaration of Independence has a well-known phrase describing the rights of all Americans as being “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” Is this last right, the pursuit of happiness, a Jewish ideal? Can one be an American Jew and pursue happiness? 

  In this week’s פרשה, the תורה has three aliyot dedicated to the פרשת המועדים which describes the שלש רגלים. The torah tells us “ושמחת בחגך.” What is the happiness the תורה refers to? In today’s day in age, we usually associate happiness with fun. If you go to the gym and watch the YU Macs basketball game, you will probably say that it made you happy. Rav Lamm z”l in דרשות לדורות describes happiness differently, explaining that happiness is “an ordered, harmonious way of life which offers deep satisfaction.” The Macs game isn’t happiness; it is fun and fun can be the the opposite of happiness. We can use it as an escape from the challenges life brings us. We use “having fun” as an excuse for avoiding life’s complicated problems.

That does not mean that all fun is bad as Rav Lamm z”l emphasizes. If done in a clean and controlled environment, there are many healthy ways to have fun. But, more often than not, we see fun as going crazy and not caring about the things around us. Some places even make fun an ideal. If you look at the American calendar there is some sort of holiday nearly every day of the year. There is a week dedicated for this, and a day dedicated for that. We strive and yearn to always get away and just have fun. But in the words of Rav Lamm z”l, “Fun, is evidently, a failure.” So what makes us different? Isn’t the Jewish calendar full of holidays as well? Yes, but as I said before, on the שלש רגלים we have שמחה not fun. Let us explore the difference. As opposed to how we have defined fun - an escape mechanism from the challenges of life - שמחה can only come at certain times. יום טוב is a time where we elevate our נשמות and realize that we live in the presence of ה׳ and that we are never alone.

This is highlighted by the fact that the פסוק says that בני ישראל would go to the בית המקדש during the שלש רגלים to be “לפני ה.” Simcha does not come from avoiding the fact that there is evil in the world and blinding ourselves from pain and death. IT’S THE DIRECT OPPOSITE! שמחה comes from the appreciation that in our world, despite the evil, sickness, and pain, הקדוש ברוך הוא is watching over us. The שלש רגלים are not just events that happened on these days many years ago. They are an expression of the joy we have of being the עם הנבחר whom Hashem constantly watches over.

The שפת אמת takes this one step further, saying that each of the מועדים represents something much deeper. Right before discussing the מועדים, the Torah mentions the מצוה of making a קידוש ה׳. The שפת אמת says that this juxtaposition is no coincidence. Each מועד comes to teach us another way to make a קידוש ה׳, and each מועד is connected to one of the big three sins we need to die rather than commit, which is learned out from the פסוק of קידוש ה׳. 

Pesach lines up with שפיכות דמים. Whereas the Egyptians viewed us as worthless beings and threw our babies in the Nile, we celebrate the value of life. We don’t merely “have fun.” We learn from פסח that we should be overjoyed with happiness just because life was granted to us in the first place. We have to appreciate life itself!

Sukkot is connected to גילוי עריות. On סוכות we remember how Hashem took us out of מצרים which was filled of גילוי עריות and brought us to the מדבר where we each had our own סוכות where we could practice צניעות. When someone performs an act of promiscuity, they break apart a family. We learn from סוכות to be happy with our family and the home we live in.

Lastly, עבודה זרה is associated with שבועות. On שבועות we received the תורה and we now show our appreciation for ה׳ and His great gift. We celebrate the opportunity that we have as Jews to learn תורה and to live a life of purpose. Unlike fun, which is a form of escaping this world, שמחה give us the opportunity to appreciate and be מקדש this world. 

To quote Rav Taragin שליט"א, and what we say every morning: “אשרינו מה טוב חלקינו”. How amazing are the things we have and the fact that we were born with a purpose and as a part of the Jewish People. We must remember the awesome opportunity we have to be בשמחה every day and just appreciate our relationship with Hashem as part of the עם הנבחר. 

Just a side note, although we don’t usually celebrate the American holidays, Mother’s Day which is next Sunday should remind us to thank our moms for everything they have done for us. So IY”H we should take this opportunity to appreciate the Torah, the chevra, and just life itself, and may we all be in ירושלים on שבועות with Mashiach and the Third בית המקדש.

Shabbat Shalom and Good Shabbos!! 

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[1] I read this דבר תורה in דרשות לדורות, which is a collection of דברי תורה given by Rabbi Dr. Norman Lamm Z”L. He gave over this דבר תורה on May 6, 1961 and I just wanted to point out that almost 60 years later, the idea is still relevant. This shows the timelessness of תורה. And the fact that the title for the book is דרשות לדורות makes it even more geshmak.